Love your own body

By Katerina Janouch

Not being able to really enjoy sex is a common problem that many women face. It is connected to the pressure that many women face, the feeling of not being good enough, and difficulty achieving orgasm, which has always been one of the most common sexual problems for women of all ages. Some women even believe that female orgasm is a myth ... though this is obviously not true.

Most women are born with the ability to come. Still, techniques are often defective, and you can enter a vicious circle, where you lose all hope of ever experiencing the climax of sexual pleasure. What I can tell you is that you should never give up, because the ability to orgasm can be worked on and developed.

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Many women have a complex attitude to their own bodies, to their breasts and their genitalia. Ideals of feminine beauty cause problems for many of us, as well as concerns about not being sufficiently attractive, not being good enough. It is usual for women to think that they must be perfect in every way to be loved and to have good sex. Nothing could be more wrong.

The quality of your sexuality is not determined by perfection, the opposite is the case. Think about how you see your partner. Is it really important that they look like a model? Or are there other qualities that make you more excited? Well, the same applies to how other people see you.

We are constantly exposed to many contradictory messages about sexuality. I dare say that our sexuality is the most complicated thing that we human beings ever have to deal with. Especially if we are women, but the same is true of men. Sexuality runs like a red line through our lives and is both a blessing, but it can very often also become a stressor.

All women should take the time to become more familiar with their genital area and be confident that it's good enough. This is the place where the complexes from which many people suffer are located.

I wish that everybody could relax a little more and see sexuality as something natural and positive instead of being locked into attitudes that make you unnecessarily harsh on yourself, and also make you deal with feelings of shame and guilt.

I even know women who have never even looked at their own genitals, and who have no idea what they look like between their legs. Taking a mirror and inspecting their genitals is a valuable exercise that every woman should perform as early as her teenage years. Still, it is never too late to become acquainted with this part of the body, regardless of your age.

It may at first feel unfamiliar and strange, but this probably has more to do with the fact that we women are brought up to have a very ambivalent attitude towards our own genitals and to our sexuality in general. I also think that there has been a kind of sexual backlash nowadays, where sexuality is seen as guilty, and where religious dogmas enter the picture as a disruptive factor, a sort of muddy sexual morality that creates unnecessary guilt and shame when it comes to your private sexuality. Get rid of these feelings, and dare to love yourself as you are, and enjoy having a good time in bed! Sex is a natural part of life, and it is very important to our well-being. It should not be subject to a lot of moralizing and prohibition.

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Other articles by Katerina Janouch

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Men – how to get the sex life you want!

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